Life is Calling … Only You Can Answer

What happens when what you feel is SO INTENSE that you can’t dismiss it? It’s so powerful; if you ignore it, the noise only becomes louder …

A friend of mine is going through this. Life is calling her, more and MORE everyday. She shuffles through all the possibilities. Overwhelmed by the options. Excited by the prospect of something new. Considering living in other countries. Aware that “running from her problems” won’t solve them. Although in her mid twenties, she is calling it a “mid life crisis” (although humorous, she’s not joking – it’s real for her). As this noise gets louder, it drowning out the opinions of others & her own logical mind. She’s now tapping into something bigger then her. Although scary & unfamiliar grounds, it’s the gateway to a life of possibility!

After all “new inputs = new outputs”.

(Maybe this is true for you too …)

As someone who is familiar with this process … it seems others turn down this voice, not believing in their worth as a human-being or simply saying “next time”. This friend however is fortunate, she’s listening to it. With commitment, great reward can come for her, more then she even knows. Some might say the “fruits of life”. If you’ve seen or read “The Secret”, it’s like that, but real life, not some mystical thing.

For me, finding & honouring this voice is the very reason I’m committed to being more everyday. Also why I strive to be more open & authentic on my blog every entry (scary as it is sometimes). The voice is the most powerful “thing” I’ve ever found; it’s all inside me. Just like your voice is inside you … it’s not in your friends, family, coaches, teachers … anyone else, although they might help you find it. It’s 100% in you.

Finding your voice —> where to start?

As mentioned above, your voice is 100% in you, which means yes … it starts & ends with you. Here are some questions to consider …

  • Why are you here?
  • What draws passion out of you?
  • What do you want out of life?

(take some time to be with these questions … the answers may be elusive, but they’re very valuable)

* Tip: look at times in your life where you’ve “swam downstream”, where things happened easily. Life doesn’t need to be hard, that’s something we create.

Here’s what’s true for me …

“A large part of my “why” is fueled by the loss of my father, in addition to a deepening appreciation for life. It’s through this experience, I know life is to short to chase some “dream” unconsciously thinking it’s my passion (something I have done), when it’s more truly the passion of some author or speaker.

Consciously choosing my path is the most rewarding way to live. I can either float around aimlessly in the ocean, associating with “good people” and “cool things” or board the ship-liner of my journey & go for it!”

We’re only scratching the surface of what’s possible. Our potential to be powerful, open & responsible in our life & support others is left mostly untapped. Ego runs rampant in the world. We blame others, trapped as victims, not realizing we have the capacity to change our life experience, which will domino positively into the life of others.  All the potential in this world is latent inside you & me. It’s waiting …

Consider this … you’re one of 6 billion people who’ve been selected to walk the face of this earth, for somewhere between 50-100 years. That’s phenomenal! Someday you will be a part of history. How will you reflect on your life? How will others speak of you?

Will it be in awe & gratitude for what you’ve done, & who you’ve been?

It’s 100% possible, in fact you may already be on that path. Ultimately you know best … that voice will speak 😉

What if you could start this journey today, would you?

I hope so. You deserve it & it’s available!

Email me kyle@kylemcneil.com if you’re looking for guidance on this or simply want to discuss.

All the best,

Kyle

PS – “The DNA of Success” is a great book to consider reading. Zufelt says: “when you’ve found your core purpose, you’ll climb mountains & swim rivers to achieve your goal”. 15 months ago I wasn’t anywhere near this place. It was an incredibly trying time, so lost & nowhere near my purpose. This awareness though, was the first step towards change & ultimately a much more fulfilling life experience. After all isn’t that the point? To LIVE life …

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1 Month Ago Today … everything changed

1 month ago, today @ 1pm – my brother called me …

Robin: “Hi Kyle, how’s it going”?

Me: “good Robin, what’s up”?

Robin: “dad has passed away” …

(Our conversation continued, but you get the point … not easy to take …)

A couple week later a friend from Florida asked me “what happened”; here’s my reply …

My dad fought cancer for over 2 years. Cancer of the esophagus. As the months closed, so did his throat & his ability to take on food. The last weeks were painful. At one point he said to me “every moment bleeds into the next” … he never said it explicitly, but I could tell it was hell. Very much.

He used to be 240 lbs; died at around 150 (at best). I said good bye to his physical body, the day after he passed. First with my mom & brother as a family. Then one last trek in to say goodbye to my father. The hardest moment of my entire life to this point. As I once again feel the agony of the experience – I close in saying, thank you for your friendship & sharing in this opportunity we call life.

Kyle

In the last 30 days, here are some things that are real for me …

1) It’s said “when the WHY is strong enough the HOW will show itself”. The passion inside to really “go for it” in life – the WHY, is stronger then ever for me. As Dr David Wolf tells, living with a sense of “urgency”, is the idea that “every moment counts”. David lost his mother in early February, making the theme of urgency relevant for him as well.

2) People are inherently well intentioned, even through layers of advice, like “stay strong” and “he’s in a better place now”. Tip: 80% of people have some type of advice around death – on the whole, as survivor it’s quite relentless … 5-10 ppl/day with advice is difficult to deal with. Please consider the power of this “The First Duty of Love is to Listen”.

* Note: the tone in the linked blog post, is considerably stronger then the message here. Different circumstance. So it’s clear I am grateful for all the support. Also I’m aware, death isn’t an easy thing to handle, regardless of proximity. Goal here is to be honest & shed “light” on the experience & topic … maybe to help others in the future.

3) Further to that, having great friendships really showed its worth – thank you to these countless people!

Enjoy your day & the moment,

Kyle

PS – the message isn’t necessarily “don’t give advice” … more so to consider reducing “it” especially around times of extreme hardship.

One Prisoner; One Guard … Same Guy

10’s upon 100’s of jail cells … all around me. One specifically to my right, seems like it could be mine, however I’m not inside it. Where I stand is the hallway of an entire prison. Looking down the prison there is no one else …

Who created this prison?

The answer is – me & my mind … the only prisoner & the only guard.

As I sit in this realization, the prison starts lifting off the ground. Very much depicting the process I’m in. Shifting my habits, thoughts & ultimately life. Living for what I want, not what I “should do” or be.

… the prison rises about 3-4 feet above the ground, clunking to a stop. Chains holding it in place, taking it no further. It’s not ready to float away & vanish. There’s 26 years of comfort here! … even in the realization of the pain, that this prison MUST go.

A few days after this realization … the quote below came through my email …

Spiritual Healing is not just becoming free from pain, it is realizing that you were never really trapped. ~ James Keeley

Do you live in a self created prison?

The more I share this story, the more it seems to be relevant for others. And on a lighter note … when writing this blog, Creed’s song “My Own Prison” came to mind. The final lyrics ringing out so clearly. “I created, I created, I created, I created my own prison”.

Kyle

PS – If you have further pull towards this topic, feel free to tune in around the 37 minute mark on the Satvatove Radio Show. The caller will be familiar. And in line with a previous blog around “The Age of Authenticity“, I’m taking a leap of faith … to live what I believe. Be the change right … don’t just blog about it.

Song Writing in a “Civic Cycle”

Here are some basic, but potentiall very powerful tips for writing a great song in a “civic cycle”.

1. Study music from the 20’s, 30’s & 40’s … based on the idea that our society is cyclical … every 40 years we shift into a new cycle.

2. Write so people can personally identify with what’s being said … make it real for your listener.

More on where this comes from on my other blog …

Kyle

Published in: on September 30, 2009 at 11:23 pm  Comments (1)  
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Creating Change – Balancing Discomfort & Hope

It’s always intriguing how at the right moment I’ll stumble across something in a book that resonates so deeply … and I sit in awe. Typically it provides relevant and current meaning or sparks one of those incredible epiphany moments.

This is one of those times … an excerpt from the book: “One Powerful Mind”:

“The must be a balance between discomfort and hope to prompt change. Discomfort generates motivation. On the other hand, comfort frequently generates complacency. When there is an absence of hope, there is an absence of incentive. Returning to the car analogy (reference to a car that’s breaking down), the discomfort arises once you become aware that there is a problem with your vehicle. The incentive (or motivator) occurs when there is hope that the car can be repaired. Ultimately you want to achieve a balance between discomfort and hope. There will always be a benefit to you personally”.

What shines through here for me … is the fact that in recent months, discomfort in my life has been growing and growing! In fact it has been quite stressful at times (which could be a whole other blog post). However I’m grateful for incredible friends, family, books & colleagues who’ve continued to inject me with hope and encouragement. In fact if you’re reading this blog you’re likely one of those people. Often times we don’t know the impact we’ve made on someone.

One of my best friends Tim Francis creates hope, opportunity & ideas as if it’s going out of style. Since the very day I met him, 5 years ago at the University of Alberta he’s been such an incredible leader. Naturally our friendship has grown higher and higher; we’ve crossed a lot of bridges together, climbed some mountains and even watched a rock band fall to pieces before our very eyes.

As a side note … watching something you’ve worked so hard on, fall apart was pretty tough … I wouldn’t recommend it!

Back to the matter at hand …

Tim has always constantly looked at himself in the mirror and asked the tough questions, “what do I need to do, to get grow”?. He’s pushing to get better and get better he does! He’s been nothing short of inspirational & motivating for me; I’d like to thank you for that Tim. It’s your fearless nature and desire to help others that will take you everywhere you want to go. Cheers to you Tim Francis!

To wrap up …

In my next blog post, I’ll share the dirt around my discomfort & hope. It’s kind of a “Kyle bears all moment”, well not in that sense, but you’ll see.

Until then … enjoy those breath taking moments!

Kyle

P.S. Two EASY ways you can stay tuned to my blog are: 1) Kyle’s Blog Group on Facebook or 2) google reader, which is simple to use and allows you to stay in touch with any blog at any time that’s convenient for you.